“Peer Rejection” has come to mind and discussion a lot lately and so I thought I’d add my own two cents on the subject and see where it goes.
Who am I you may ask? I am Robert Wilkinson, I am not a Doctor, nor a psychologist, nor counselor. I am speaking only as another human occupant of this world, and as an eye witness to our social stumbles. I have taken notice that the roots of rejection usually can run deep within us and for a plethora of reasons that are usually seeded as a child. For many of us, the reasons can actually even begin while or before in the womb itself. Sadly passed on like a social disease by social actions, family in-actions, or simply learned by example. Most commonly are the ones we learn when we were all fired up to join the soccer team (or any other group for example) and then found out the soccer click didnt take kind to us and punched us in the gut and told us to go home we suck. Now some of us went home and some of us stayed and learned how to adapt.
But sadly I still see so much even as an adult that boarders a toddlers actions. As an adult I still see so much ‘Peer Rejection’ it hurts my heart to watch without action. – and I will explain what I mean by “action” a little farther down. I am more than sure I can write a whole collection of books just on the subject of Rejection just in my own life, but I want to keep this simple and to the point. Adult Peer Rejection.
“Peer Rejection”, we have all felt it at some point. I have felt peer rejection even in the workplace, whether as a Project Manager or more times as an Artist & Photographer amongst other VIPs–or those regarded as being more well known) for example.
I may even feel rejected if they don’t seem interested in talking with me or react negatively to my artwork. Too many people have the tendency (and I find it wrong) to ignore or shut out other people simply because they are not quite on the same level of talent, achievements or prestige. Leaving the ‘devil’ as they say or whatever you choose to call the negative force, to certainly take these opportunities to inflict a sense of rejection on anyone who is insecure at all. I don’t know about you, but I don’t like to be a tool for negative influences myself, and I try to remain aware of this in my actions.
No wonder the bible tells us not to be a respecter of persons (Acts 10:34). – Something I picked up in Sunday School as a child and I always felt there is a lot of wisdom in that. Anyone who remembers me in school will tell you that I didn’t keep to or stay in clicks. I welcomed every person in every group on their own merit and even was pretty popular myself, but not in one group but them all.
And so I purposely draw people in who look insecure and seem alone or uncomfortable during my daily walk through life as much as possible. I take every opportunity when I happen to be in the VIPs in the room, to open the doors and welcome all levels of talent & even make friends with the help. I have found during my life that the other VIPs will take my lead almost every time when I do. Thus sleighing the spirit of rejection in the room and maybe win just one more war in somebody’s heart to tip the balance for good.
Remember this next time you’re the VIP. A simple action of understanding, humanity and humility on your part can go a long way.